The Difference Between Guidance and Giving Your Power Away
There’s nothing wrong with seeking support.
Healers, readers, therapists, mentors, coaches. These can all be part of your journey. I’m not here to tell you to stop going to them. I go to them too.
But there’s a question worth asking yourself. When you sit with someone for guidance, are you there to be reminded of what you already know? Or are you there to be told who you are?
Because those are two very different things.
One builds you up. The other continually points you towards denying your own truth in search of answers no one else can really give you.
How this pattern starts
Most of us were trained to look outside ourselves from the very beginning. School taught us that the teacher had the answers. Our families taught us that certain people knew better. Society taught us that experts, authority figures, and anyone with a title were more trustworthy than our own inner knowing.
So by the time we find ourselves in a healing space, we’ve already been practicing external validation for decades. It makes sense that we’d show up to a reading or a session and want someone to just tell us. Tell me what to do. Tell me what’s coming. Tell me I’m on the right path.
If someone else makes the call, you don’t have to risk being wrong. You don’t have to trust yourself. And if it doesn’t work out, it’s not really your fault.
But here’s what that costs you: your own voice gets quieter every time you override it. Your self-trust erodes. And you become dependent on something outside of you to feel okay about your own life.
What good guidance actually does
Real support doesn’t make you need more support. It makes you need less.
A good healer, reader, or guide isn’t trying to keep you coming back forever. They’re trying to point you back to yourself. They’re holding up a mirror so you can see what you already know but have been afraid to look at.
When you leave a session with someone who’s really doing their work, you should feel more connected to yourself. Not more confused. Not more dependent. Not waiting for the next session to tell you what to do next.
You should feel like you got reminded of something. Like you came home to yourself a little more.
If you’re leaving sessions feeling more lost, more unsure of yourself, more like you need them to function, that’s information. That’s worth paying attention to.
Questions to ask yourself
Next time you seek guidance from someone, notice what’s happening in you.
Are you hoping they’ll confirm what you want to hear? Or are you hoping they’ll override what you know because you don’t want it to be true?
Are you there to receive insight and then check it against your own body? Or are you there to hand over the decision entirely?
Are you building a relationship with your own knowing? Or are you avoiding it?
There’s no shame in any of these answers. Just honesty. And honesty is where the shift starts.
You are allowed to receive support. You are allowed to have people in your corner who see things you can’t see yet. That’s part of being human. We need each other.
But you are also the authority of your own life. Your soul has everything it needs for this journey. It always has.
The right guidance will never let you forget that.